Sunday, November 28, 2010

Chopstick Octopus

Octopus made of chopsticks --
So, this is made of 2000 used chopsticks. How? Go figure. I think she put them together then chopped and glued them then sculpted away. I really have no clue. But it looks great!

Also, here's another cool octopii related item:

Ask a ninja on Black Friday

He knows how to tell it. Expressing my feelings on Black Friday, The ask a ninja Ninja:

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Toonies for blood

So The toonie race...

Yeah, that was all gnarly. Who soaped the corners!?
I leave Poco like 8:45, and hitch a bus to the uni. Y'all know what went down...
We didn't race much. We said go, and clapped our hands like a strange breed of human, and gunned it down a
few times. Then we went to another spot. There was no winner. But, actually, I think I was second the first
race. First on the practice run, then the last run i'm pretty sure I won, even though that one was completely un-
officiall, and not sanctioned in any way by the dudes that were organising the shit. It didn't seem like there was any decorum
because soon enough, there was cops! They were hanging around at first, baring their teeth, and showing their claws, as it were,
and then all of a sudden there was "like six cars", reports a racer. I dodged em when I was coming down on that run,
but once they were there, clearly they didn't appreciat our presence, so we peaced.
And yeah, someone SOAPed the corners. Y'all wanna see crashes, go watch nascar! I can't believe some of the dodges I
was getting away with. I missed this guy's* tail by mere... hairs. But like a lot of 'em together. so like 3 cms give or take
Anyways, I was riding easy, and only hit the soap once, luckily. I was really carving, getting on the inside of everyone's
business, spotting the corners far ahead, a smooth line that always had enough traction. I was just on top of the board for some
reason, only had a couple skids and one crash in the five? races we did. The secret: start on the outside and wait for the crowd to
clear. So striker knew a place where we could carve hella, also indoors. And this place: a gift from the gods.
No-one was parked there, bar a few cars
NO-one was using it
No-one was in our way.
It was just for us to enjoy, all ours. We thrived.
It was
... a magical discovery that had been passed on down to us from the longboarding elders. Wisdom that
we must use wisely and only in the wee hours of the night when the police officers are asleep
with doughnut crumbs in their 'staches and their gun in their hands.

So I am gonna shout out to my big zigs and how awesome they are. Also gonna shout out to Marco, and the guy in
the red shirt 'cus I cut him off. 'Feel ya, bro!' Without the thick contact patch and the not too-grippy duro,
I would've been a complete loss in the wet patches of our second locale. Our new baby had steep-ish one-story
ramps around the lot with tight turns directed in half by the thin rubber barriers that resided in the middle
but that was nice. There was a defnied lane this way, and I think it allowed for some good dodges. Like a
few times i took the wide route to get around a crash, and i could launch right into the outside lane. It got
pretty tight around the apex's, cause peeps were slipping out due to spread wetness, and later on due to some
...not cool. You're lucky i'm not a hostile guy, but whoever you are, don't do it again!
Whatever. I get grouch when my shredding is impeded or interrupted. Whatevs, it was so dope we skated it like
10 times, at least! Strike went back to the o.g. spot but we stuck around to shred this one 'cause we were all
shredding it to death. It's basically a long right-hander, with a speed bump on the last turn that I always
carved hard around. It was hella lean on that turn, just lifting my hand enough to get the outrigging over the
bump. A few times I came pretty close to the walls of the small, rubber barrier. My shoulder hurts. ONe time i ran
into a guy and hella smashed my elbow. Hard pavement. Shock all the way up the arm to the JAW, of all places. I
took a breath and kept riding the rail. There were a few gnar bails, but that's because everyone's so stoked to get
down they all either catch up with eachother or slide out and make the path littered with wet-wheeled outta-control
shredders. I learned that you must go wide in the rain, and EASY on the carve. Stay on top of it. A few times
I slithered back to the right direction after slipping a tad.
I really came to appreciate how many ways one can control the directions one's going and how their turn will go. There's
so many inputs into it. I was really learning to respond to the corner and Adjust where I was in relation to the board.
And it's so fun when it works, it feels like you're really riding a curving wave. Doing everything to stay on top of the
carve. That's why I didn't always want to be first, if I tried to do that I was always running into other dudes or sliding
out 'cus I couldn't figure out my line through the fallen. Although I'd say half the time I got through 'em all, it was
terribly good fun dodging bro's off their boards. I was just not able to handle the wet until about... later when I
realised low is the way to go. In da middle, not in da club. Now my knees hurt.

So for SOME reason, we decided to leave to try the last place out. Don't know why we chose to probe the security guard, but
he only showed on my final run, and if he would've told me to go, I would've gone. But instead he said "You're under arrest"
To my shocked yet guilty mug. Yes, my expression was one of shock and bewilderment, as it just moments before had been one
of good cheer and joviality. A good fun, you caught me, I lose, kinda attitude I had. But he decided to block my way. So I
wanted to get to my friend, throw a hug around' the guy, maybe rough his hair up a bit with joy of seeing that my ride has
not left, and pounced through a hole in his defences. He pushed back. And lo, my noggin whent a nockin' on the edge of the
elevator frame. Metal. On head. Ouch. Blood.

So I freak out, I mean, where was he coming from, getting off on using such drastic measures? He had been all, "I told you
already" And I'm all "No, dude, you did not literally come up to me to tell me to leave. And, to be truthfull, as soon as
they probed our track, instead of just prowling as they were before, I called it my last run. Then I was outie. New spot.
But he said he seen a guy with my same board and helmet and shirt. I could've picked something more under the radar. Eh.
Fok 'em.
I am telling him that he should be worried, and he's all saying I hit him. We had a spat. Lots of
shouting involved. So cops come 'round, Everything settles down. I was actually shaking, my head was hurting. And I was
very amped. I was also cold, my wet shoes and socks, not to mention sweaty kneepads were cooling off. I just couldn't
belive this guy. He didn't even say sorry! And now he's saying I hit HIM! Assault! PshA! And then there was some threat
charges he wanted to bring around. But I'm all getting cleaned up, guys are touching my stuff, cleaning it 'cus it's
bleeding. I made sure to tell him that we were using the other locale because there was noone there and noone to disturb
so we took it. I told him I didn't come there 'cus I had nothing of interest with so many police officers prowling around.
So He actually calls the medics over, to make sure I'm alright, and they put one of 'dem fake stitches, that's really just
a real strong peice of tape but it does the trick pretty good. I'm sealed, I should be in a day, but no playing with it.
Cop comes back over and tells me now that he has kids, feels bad that he bus'ed mah head op'n, and also that he gorges him
self with food over-extensively which makes his capillaries and veins constricted, not providing his brain with enough
oxygen to calmly and without prejudice and angst respond to a situation. He pissed me off. So the guard is gonna drop HIS
charges, if I forget about MY charges. How rich, eh? The medics are cool dudes and they calm me down hella. So I get sent off.
Always be calm and collected with the officer, because I know he wants to hear the story, and he gets so much bullshit that
it's best to tell him what he wants, use few words and they will be more ...empathetic. I just had to make it clear to the
other guy that he's not a cop, that he can't go using brutal, potentially harmfull force on people without abecause he isn't properly
trained to do it. A police officer is.

All in all, a very lucky night. I feel like lady luck wanted me from the start, and so she's all trying to do me favors 'n stuff.
I mean, from the start, I was dodging all the accidents and I ended up winning. You can se me HERE:
I'm at 2:30, passing on the inside, past the dude in the red Tee.

THEN, the cops let me go with JUST enough time to catch the LAST bus out of UBC, which I wouldn't have caught if the driver hadn't
slowed down. He turns out to be super chill, and buys us all coffee!! Thanks, lady luck.

Remember, people. Small acts!